Yay! for Anxiety.

So I have generalized anxiety and depression. Heavy on the anxiety side. This has been an ongoing problem my whole life, and I’m 43. I’ve been resistant to take meds because of an experience when I was younger, but a couple of years ago, it got so bad, I had to go see a Doctor. I started taking an anti-anxiety prescription and things calmed down. Fast forward to about a year ago. Daddy and I moved in together and the happiness I’ve felt since then just can’t be overstated. I’m so used to constant turmoil in my life, it felt like a happy, rose colored dream even on “bad” days. I convinced myself that I just didn’t need the meds anymore. Yeah, I know. Ridiculous. I’ve even advised other people to not do what I did. In my head, was thinking, “Of course you feel better and “cured”! You’ve been on the meds that brought you to that conclusion!”. Well, it took a year but, BIG SURPRISE! I’m not cured. Last night, I was slam in the middle of a glorious sexual experience and BAM! A panic attack came out of nowhere! Not just a tiny one. I’m talking, sobbing and doing some form of trying to speak (not even close to being understandable words between my hyperventilating, shaking, and sobbing), waving my hands, and just fundamentally freaking the total fuck out. Daddy has seen, and dealt with this before, so he was his normal calm self. He rubbed my back, had me breathe with him, got an inhaler for me, and focused my attention on his voice. It took a while, but I came out of it. He scolded me gently for not having any of my medicine, and informed me I would be going back to the doctor in a timely fashion.